


Hold Me Close (To Keep Away The Memories)

by BambixRonno



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (Video Games)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Post-Sonic Forces, Pre-Relationship, Sharing a Bed, also hi idk how to tag things, but lbr you probably won't now you've seen the relationship tag, could be read as platonic, no beta we die like men, so if you want me to tag something just lmk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:21:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24415819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BambixRonno/pseuds/BambixRonno
Summary: "What do you want, Faker? Why are you here at-" Shadow squinted at the clock- "three in the fucking morning?"Sonic swallowed, tapping his foot anxiously, feeling a lot like a scared little kid under Shadow's judgemental stare."Well?""I can't sleep."Unpleasant memories are keeping Sonic awake at night, so he seeks comfort from the one person who might be able to understand.
Relationships: Shadow the Hedgehog/Sonic the Hedgehog
Comments: 50
Kudos: 390





	Hold Me Close (To Keep Away The Memories)

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't GONNA inflict this ooc trash on the site meant for actual quality fics but y'all left me with no choice when I found the lack of bed sharing fics so here

Sonic stared at the door to Shadow's room and, just for a moment, reconsidered his decision. This was a bad idea. A horrifically bad idea that would result in him getting cussed out at best and his ass kicked at worst, and he should turn around and go back to his room while he still had the chance.

Instead, he reached out and slowly pushed the door open, wincing as it creaked loudly. He peeked into the room, sighing in relief when he saw the door opening hadn't woken Shadow. Not that it really mattered, since Sonic was planning on waking him anyway, but he'd rather wake him on purpose than accidentally. At least then he wouldn't accuse Sonic of trying to sneak around his room while he was sleeping. The less paranoid he was, the less likely it was he would kick Sonic's ass and send him back to his room.

And the  _ last  _ thing Sonic wanted was to go back to his room.

Still, he only managed a step forward before he hesitated, hovering nervously in the doorway. Was this a mistake? This was almost definitely a mistake. It was a bad idea, and bad ideas usually went hand-in-hand with mistakes. Shadow probably wouldn't appreciate being woken up in the middle of the night, especially not for Sonic's problems. He just hadn't known what else to  _ do. _ He'd been tossing and turning all night, unable to sleep, and the few times he  _ had _ drifted off he'd almost immediately jerked awake from some steadily forming nightmare or another. And his room was so  _ cold  _ and  _ empty. _ The silence had grated on his ears, trying to drag him back to memories he  _ did not want to visit _ , full of shackles and taunts and pain and overwhelming  _ helplessness he couldn't do anything they were fighting for their lives and he was just sat there- _

So he'd gotten up and out of his room (because he could, he was free to move around as he pleased, he wasn't trapped or confined and most importantly he wasn't  _ there-) _ to clear his head and find someone who would let him stay, and the next thing he knew, his feet had carried him to the room Shadow was using while he helped the Resistance deal with the last of the robots left over from Eggman's reign. Shadow was no stranger to nightmares or insomnia, after all, so perhaps he'd pity Sonic enough to let him stay.

But now that he was here, Sonic couldn't help but have second thoughts. Just because Shadow might understand, or be sympathetic, didn't mean he'd want Sonic invading his space. They were friends, sure, but they weren't exactly  _ close. _ Shadow had Rouge and Omega and… and whoever else he had in his life. He hadn't needed Sonic to have a bigger role in his life, and Sonic was fine with that. He had plenty of friends anyway, like Knuckles and Amy and Tails. He didn't need to be a major part in Shadow's life; he was just happy to be able to call him a friend.

A friend that likely wouldn't appreciate being woken up in the middle of the night just because Sonic couldn't sleep.

Maybe it would have made more sense to go to Tails or Knuckles. He'd known them the longest, and Tails was his best friend. Neither of them would mind if he asked to stay in their rooms for the night, even if Knuckles would put up a grumpy act about it. It was just… Tails hadn't been sleeping well lately, and Sonic didn't want to disturb him now he was finally getting some rest. And Knuckles would just ask questions about why he couldn't sleep, questions that Sonic just couldn't answer right now. Knuckles meant well, but he just couldn't deal with an interrogation on why he was having so many nightmares and why the silence was so loud it made him forget where he was.

Shadow wouldn't ask any questions. He'd understand.

Sonic took another step into the room. The floor creaked beneath him, and Shadow shifted under the blankets. Sonic froze, every muscle in his body tensing even as Shadow settled down again. After a minute, when Shadow didn't seem to be waking up, he relaxed again.

Shadow wouldn't ask questions, but he  _ definitely  _ wouldn't appreciate being woken up in the middle of the night. And so what if he understood? If anything, that was more reason to leave him alone. He  _ knew _ Shadow had trouble sleeping sometimes, and it wasn't fair of him to ask him to give up one of his rare nights of peaceful sleep just because  _ Sonic  _ was having problems doing so.

This was definitely a mistake. He never should have come here. He should take his chance with Knuckles and leave Shadow to sleep in peace. If he was lucky, Knuckles would be too tired to ask him any questions, and so long as Sonic woke up before him, he'd be fine-

"Are you going to explain why you're here, or are you going to stand in the doorway all night?"

Sonic winced as Shadow cracked open an eye to glare at him. Well, too late to back out now.

"Hi."

"What do you  _ want, _ Faker? Why are you here at-" Shadow squinted at the clock- "three in the fucking morning?"

Sonic swallowed, tapping his foot anxiously, feeling a lot like a scared little kid under Shadow's judgemental stare. He couldn't even remember the last time he ran to sleep with someone because of a bad dream. He was used to people running to _ him _ for comfort, not the other way around. The role reversal made his skin prickle in discomfort.

"Well?"

"I can't sleep."

"... What."

"I can't  _ sleep. _ It's too quiet and really loud and I keep thinking about-"  _ too much too much you're rambling stop talking he doesn't need to know-  _ "about stuff and it's really empty and it's driving me crazy cause I keep forgetting-"  _ shut up shut up shut  _ **_up_ ** _ \-  _ "and it's making it hard to sleep even though I'm super tired-"

"Get to the  _ point _ ."

"Can I sleep with you?"

The silence was almost as loud as the one in Sonic's room. Shadow sat up properly to squint at him, and Sonic's face flushed in shame, stomach twisting uneasily. Which was ridiculous _ , _ there was no shame in needing to spend the night with someone, he'd told Tails that countless times. He'd  _ never _ judge someone for being too scared to sleep alone, this shouldn't be any different.

But it was. It was, and he didn't know why. He lowered his eyes to avoid Shadow's gaze, hugging his arms to himself, rocking back and forth on his heels. He'd never felt so self-conscious, and that somehow made it worse. This wasn't like him,  _ none _ of this was like him at all. What was wrong with him?

"Don't you have other friends for this sort of thing?" Shadow finally asked. 

"They're all asleep."

"So was I."

Sonic winced. "I know."

"Why didn't you go wake  _ them? _ "

"Tails hasn't been sleeping well, I didn't wanna disturb him. And Knuckles would just ask me stuff. I…" Sonic bit his lip. "I didn't know who else to go to."

Shadow stared at him for a long time, long enough for Sonic to start fidgeting. This was definitely a mistake. An awful, humiliating mistake. He should have taken his chance with Knuckles. Shadow's eyes felt like they were staring directly into his soul, picking apart everything he was and wasn't saying, and he felt incredibly small under the weight of that stare.

What did he think Shadow could do, anyway? He couldn't stop the nightmares. He couldn't take away the memories. He couldn't convince Sonic's brain to stop dragging him to a place he was no longer in. And he wasn't exactly known for his outstanding comforting abilities. That had always been _ Sonic's  _ job, and if Sonic couldn't comfort himself, what hope did Shadow have?

He should leave. He should apologise for waking Shadow and leave while he still had some semblance of dignity, and go crawling back to his ( _ silent empty lonely) _ room to deal with his stupid,  _ stupid _ problems on his own, instead of bothering anyone else who was trying to sleep in peace.

Shadow sighed and flopped back down on the bed, closing his eyes. Sonic braced himself for the rejection, an apology already on the tip of his tongue.

"Get in, then."

"Wait. What?"

Shadow lifted the blankets, shifting over to the farthest side of the bed to make room. "I said get in."

Sonic hesitated. "Really?"

" _ Yes.  _ Either get in or get out, I don't really care, just shut the door behind you."

Well. That wasn't what he expected, but if Shadow was agreeing, Sonic wasn't going to complain. He hastily shut the door and scrambled under the blankets before Shadow could change his mind. 

The bed wasn't really big enough for two people, but Sonic didn't want to invade Shadow's space any more than he already was, so he did his best to stick to the edge as much as he could without falling off. Even then, he could faintly feel the warmth radiating from Shadow's body, his quills brushing against his own, as relaxed as their odd shape allowed them to be. Sonic's own quills flattened in response, trying to avoid hurting the one who was generous enough to share his bed with him. Not that he would. With their backs facing each other, it was unlikely that either of them would get close enough to dig their quills in, as they'd just be met with another set of quills, but it was probably best to take precautions. The last thing he wanted to do was accidentally wake Shadow by sticking his quills in his back. That probably wouldn't end well.

"Night, Shadow."

Shadow grunted in response.

The room fell silent once again, but it was different to the silence in Sonic's room. It didn't feel as lonely, and it wasn't as loud. It didn't make his heart race in anticipation for a threat that wasn't coming. It was a peaceful silence, one he rarely got to experience these days. Which was odd, considering he was sharing it with  _ Shadow. _

It wasn't that he'd never shared a bed before. Tails used to crawl into his bed all the time when he was younger, seeking comfort from nightmares and thunderstorms. It wasn't even that he'd never shared a bed with  _ Shadow _ . There'd been quite a few times they'd been forced to share a bed for one reason or another after running into each other while Shadow was on a mission. But those were different, somehow. Sharing a bed with Shadow had always held some kind of professional purpose - as professional as Sonic could get, at least. It had never been for comfort. Never been as  _ friends. _

Sharing a bed with Shadow now was more comforting than Sonic was expecting, even though neither of them were really doing anything. Shadow's slow, steady breaths behind him made it harder to forget he wasn't sitting alone in that cell, and if he _ did _ start to forget, he could close his eyes and copy Shadow's breathing until he felt calm again.

He doubted he'd sleep much tonight, but that was okay. He's dealt with plenty of sleepless nights before. So long as everything in the room stopped reminding him of… of  _ that _ , he could deal with it. He'd at least be able to rest a little, and he could always nap later.

A nap that hopefully wouldn't bring him any nightmares, because it was bad enough he was struggling to sleep anyway, the last thing he wanted was for someone to see him having a nightmare in the middle of the day-

Shadow shifted behind him, and an arm wrapped around Sonic's waist, pulling him closer to the centre of the bed. Sonic stiffened.

"You're going to fall off if you sleep on the edge like that," Shadow said.

Sonic twisted his head to look back at Shadow as best he could, smiling sheepishly. "Figured I'd try to give you as much space as possible."

"Don't bother. You're already in my space. Now shut up and go to sleep."

"Yes, sir," Sonic grinned at him, even though he was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to sleep tonight. His head plopped back down onto the pillow, waiting for Shadow to remove his arm and shift away.

He didn't. His arm remained curled around Sonic's torso, holding him close to his chest. This close he could feel Shadow's breaths against his flattened quills, warm and steady and way more soothing than they were probably supposed to be. 

It was strange to be this close to someone after six months of no physical contact. Strange, but not unwelcome; Shadow was pleasantly warm, his hold on Sonic somehow firm and gentle at the same time, and Sonic couldn't help but relax into it. He'd almost forgotten how much he missed cuddling with another person.

_ Cuddling. _ Shadow the Hedgehog was _ cuddling  _ him. If it weren't for the fact he'd been unable to sleep all night, Sonic would pinch himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming. He'd have never guessed Shadow was the type to even  _ tolerate _ cuddling, much less initiate it.

He wasn't going to tell him to stop, though. He felt calmer than he had in months. This was  _ definitely  _ a step up from those nights he'd spent in that cell, cold and lonely and shivering from the lack of a heater, curling up as much as he could to stay warm, ears twitching at every creak or groan or whir of machinery, tensing every time he heard footsteps in case… in case someone was coming to drag him back… heavy shackles restraining his hands and feet, working with his injuries to keep him from curling up properly… achy and in pain from whatever torment Eggman had inflicted on him that day… deafening silence that left him with only his thoughts for company, his mind trying to make him think about things he _ did not want to consider- _

Shadow's arm around his torso tightened slightly, jolting Sonic out of his thoughts and away from the memories he'd been fighting all night. His trembling hand shot up to latch onto the one resting on his chest above his racing heart, squeezing it tightly like the world would end if he let go.

"Try not to think," Shadow said softly. "Focus on the here and now." He could practically  _ feel _ the smirk in Shadow's voice. "You should be good at that. Thinking has never been your speciality."

Sonic chuckled weakly, giving Shadow's hand another grateful squeeze. The words were teasing, but his tone was laced with something else. Something he wouldn't have wanted if it was coming from anyone other than Shadow.

Understanding.

Sonic couldn't gather his thoughts enough to formulate a response, and Shadow didn't seem to expect one, so they laid together in silence while Sonic calmed down. He did his best to match his breathing with Shadow's until his heart stopped pounding, and the heat against his back eventually made his shoulders droop, releasing the tension he hadn't even noticed he was carrying. Shadow's thumb rubbed his fur soothingly, and he closed his eyes to focus on it better, the gentle back-and-forth motion grounding enough to keep him in the present instead of his memories.

"Better?" Shadow asked eventually.

"... Yeah."

"Good. Now go to sleep."

Sonic's lips twitched into a smile, and he  _ swore _ he could feel Shadow smiling back. 

"Yeah, yeah, I'm sleeping, I'm sleeping."

Shadow hummed, finally settling back down. His thumb was still rubbing Sonic's fur, and Sonic realised he still hadn't let go of Shadow's hand. 

Well. If Shadow was willing to tolerate it for this long, then maybe…

Hesitating only for a second, Sonic laced his fingers with Shadow's, giving him plenty of time to tell him to stop or let go. Shadow paused, just long enough for Sonic to think he was going to pull away, then slowly rubbed his thumb against Sonic's knuckle. Sonic let out a breath, the last little bit of tension finally leaving him.

"Shadow?"

"Mmh?"

"Thanks."

"Mm."

"Really. I mean it."

Shadow was silent, as if contemplating how to respond. Then…

"Go to sleep before I push you off the bed and make you sleep on the floor."

Sonic laughed quietly, giving Shadow's hand one last squeeze. Shadow pulled him a little closer in response, and he practically melted. Shadow's arms around him were comforting. Gentle. Reassuring.

Safe.

Smiling softly, Sonic finally fell asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Sonic: wow never would have thought Shadow enjoys cuddling  
> Shadow, remembering the countless cuddle piles Team Dark have had for his touch starved ass: sweats nervously


End file.
